Seek First

     I've been anxiously awaiting for this summer's bible study to start - June 13th couldn't come fast enough! I'm 3 days in now and I'm soaking it all in. It's nice letting someone else feed me. It's restful and enjoyable to follow along. 

     The study is simple, nothing over the top which is what I need in this season - back to the basics. It also fits in well with my research for my new book on gratefulness and living a satisfied life in a never satisfied world. It's so easy to always want more. Our ideas of prosperity and success are easily twisted by unhealthy ideas.  There are many temptations and the desire for wealth and materials is  sneaky and seductive. Sometimes we need to strip ourselves down and cleanse our hearts and minds. There is no better soap than the Bible and our precious Holy Spirit. The Word will thoroughly wash us! 

       God has faithfully provided for each of us. In order to live a satisfied life we must learn to count our blessings instead of counting our lack. It's been a hard month for us personally because hubby was laid off at the end of April. God filled me with peace and assurance but as the weeks went by anxiety kept finding it's way in. I reminded myself to have a quiet heart, because a quiet heart trusts God. (Blog post about a Quiet Heart)

        Every few years it seems hubby gets laid off. It can be discouraging when you hear people talk about being at one company for 20-30 years. How is that even possible? The longest job hubby has had was his last one - 6yrs! Thankfully, God yet again made a way and hubby got a job offer within a month. Unemployment is a joke! They cut it from a year, down to six months which added to our anxiety, but God. Unless you've been laid off you don't realize how fast six months passes and how slim the job market is. I'd submit hubby's resume for jobs that were listed for less than a week that already had 250 submissions - one job was listed for 1 day with 75 submissions. My heart breaks for all the people searching for jobs. 

        A year earlier, before hubby was laid off, the company he worked for cut them down to four day work weeks. He had already missed three years of raises and now he was only getting paid for four days. During this time I had a dream that hubby was laid off. Surprisingly, he made it through the first lay off despite most of the company being laid off. I still felt like God was warning us, so hubby went to school and renewed his real-estate license and sold four houses, which was a great cushion for us. God is faithful! Exactly a year later from the first lay off and my dream, hubby was sadly laid off. 

      Sometimes I wonder why things can't be easy for us. Why do we have to fast and get into this heavy prayer warrior mode to live a normal life? But the fire brings out testimony after testimony of God's faithfulness. If life was easy then we wouldn't have a book's worth of testimonies about God's supernatural power. It doesn't allow me to be spiritually lazy that's for sure. It also continues to strengthen my intimacy with God.

         This week hubby started his new job - outside of the oil and gas industry, thank God! But, like any new job, he took a pay cut, and no health benefits, so we have to purchase it independently (I wont get started on Obamacare!). The good side is there seems to be more of a future and room to grow in this new company. Also, his job title is an upgrade, "Project Manager" and he's gaining many new skills. And his boss seems to be a really great guy.

      I need to start writing a book about our life and God's faithfulness, because through every trial God pulls out a testimony. I can't tell you how many times God has helped us. Why God moves in one way and not another is the mystery of faith. If God can provide a job, or a dream, why wont he provide this or that. The bottom line is God has a purpose, a plan and a place for each of us and His ways are not our ways. We may not agree with what he provides, where he sends us, or places us but the longer we pout and wrestle the worst off we will feel. The sooner we submit to His rule and reign the sooner we will be deeply satisfied. 

         Perspective is everything sometimes. Think about the sick and hungry people all over the world. I'm sure some of them have wondered, "God, why did you place me here?", "Why didn't you choose a different plan for my life?" there is a bigger plan, a bigger picture and we are not in charge.
        In the movie the Room, a little boy and his mom have been kidnapped and locked in a room for 7 or 8 years. The mom has created a fun imaginative world to help her son cope with their circumstances. But when she finally comes up with an escape plan she has to tell her son the truth. The little boy is overwhelmed by the dark reality of their situation and cries out, "I want a different story!" Isn't that like all of us at one point or another? We cry out to God for a different story. The mom sternly says back, "This is the one you get!" God's ways are not our ways. He writes our stories and He is worthy of all our praise and all our trust. It may not be the story we want all the time, but it's the one we get, and if we stay in our lane, focus on the good God has provided and trust Him, we may be surprised that it in fact is the story we wanted in the end.

       In my Bible study the author, Courtney Joseph says about King Solomon, " I am so grateful a man wiser and more wealthy than all of us sought meaning in all the wrong places and wrote all of his experiences in a journal, so thousands of years later we can be saved the heartache of seeking fulfillment in all the wrong places." 
       I'm excited to continue this 60 day study that will encourage me to continue looking for fulfillment in the right place.