Monday, August 8, 2016

Happy 32nd Birthday to Me!

          

One thing about having a July birthday is it feels like my birthday comes super-fast every year! My hubby’s October birthday feels like it never comes around. I literally feel like I just typed a birthday blog for myself! It feels like God is speeding up time!
Embracing the quieter slower seasons is always hard for us. We take so much pride in doing things and find purpose in being busy, but I’m learning, a busy life is a distracted life.  I’ve never been an overly busy person, but like the majority of people I get a bit anxious when life remains extra slow for longer periods of time. Where do we find our purpose and motivation if we aren’t doing something? Doing something and working towards a goal makes us feel valuable and deserving, like we are measuring up and keeping up.
When we are asked to wait, sit out and rest for a season we begin feeling like we are falling behind, even unworthy.  Of course, this is not the truth, but society temps many of us in this way.
Quiet does not mean broken, quiet does not mean falling behind, quiet does not mean unworthy or purposelessness. Quite simply means healing, quiet means growth, quiet means depth and intimacy, quiet means peace. It’s inevitable that we will all have seasons like this at some point, so it’s important we don’t freak out and accept the lies.
This year God’s been showing me how I often make myself smaller than He sees me, in order to make others feel more comfortable. I’m all for making others feel comfortable. I easily read facial expressions or see people’s eyes glaze over if something is over their head or boring, so I stop talking or change the subject. I also notice when someone’s prideful, and they hate when I have wisdom about a situations. Sometimes religious older people take offense to wisdom coming from a younger person.(I'm not so young anymore! lol)
When I walk in revelation or wisdom from the Holy Spirit, I feel their anger towards me and I shrink back. The Holy Spirit has been showing me how my actions are not out of love, but fear. I should not fear being everything God created me to be. I can’t make myself smaller because certain people don’t want to grow. They will have to adjust! Most of these people aren’t even Spirit-filled so why do I care what they think anyway? We are on totally different pages.
It’s not going to be easy for me, but I’m willing to allow God to work in me. This year is going to be spent walking courageously in who I am in Christ. I have to be brave. What do I have to lose? I remember this dream I had several years ago. I was in a swing/seat that was attached to a mountain (like a ski lift, but I was at the bottom). I remember jumping a little and as soon as I jumped the chair/swing/seat clicked and started to move forward, pulling me up the mountain (like a ski lift). It was just a little jump from me that set it all in motion. Jason Upton has a song called “Scarecrow”, it also is another powerful encouragement.
The lyrics are full of truth, “There’s a scarecrow standing in a farmers field. What it’s guarding has not been revealed. I can’t find something that’s been found before. And I won’t find nothing if I close that door.  If I were a bird, if I were a foolish bird, I’d listen to my fear and fly away from here. But if I were a bird, if I were a wise bird, I’d listen to my heart and find a treasure waiting in the field.
The scarecrow is a trick to fool us into backing away from the very thing God is calling us to. Right next to the scarecrow is a fruitful garden. It’s about perspective. Maybe, just maybe, the enemy has set up scarecrows in our lives to keep us from discovering the very things that are ours in Christ!

No comments:

Post a Comment