One thing
about having a July birthday is it feels like my birthday comes super-fast
every year! My hubby’s October birthday feels like it never comes around. I
literally feel like I just typed a birthday blog for myself! It feels like God
is speeding up time!
Embracing the
quieter slower seasons is always hard for us. We take so much pride in doing
things and find purpose in being busy, but I’m learning, a busy life is a
distracted life. I’ve never been an
overly busy person, but like the majority of people I get a bit anxious when
life remains extra slow for longer periods of time. Where do we find our
purpose and motivation if we aren’t doing something? Doing something and
working towards a goal makes us feel valuable and deserving, like we are
measuring up and keeping up.
When we are
asked to wait, sit out and rest for a season we begin feeling like we are
falling behind, even unworthy. Of
course, this is not the truth, but society temps many of us in this way.
Quiet does not mean broken,
quiet does not mean falling behind, quiet does not mean unworthy or
purposelessness. Quite simply means healing, quiet means growth, quiet means
depth and intimacy, quiet means peace. It’s inevitable that we will all have
seasons like this at some point, so it’s important we don’t freak out and
accept the lies.
This year
God’s been showing me how I often make myself smaller than He sees me, in order
to make others feel more comfortable. I’m all for making others feel
comfortable. I easily read facial expressions or see people’s eyes glaze over
if something is over their head or boring, so I stop talking or change the
subject. I also notice when someone’s prideful, and they hate when I have
wisdom about a situations. Sometimes religious older people take offense to
wisdom coming from a younger person.(I'm not so young anymore! lol)
When I walk
in revelation or wisdom from the Holy Spirit, I feel their anger towards me and
I shrink back. The Holy Spirit has been showing me how my actions are not out
of love, but fear. I should not fear being everything God created me to be. I
can’t make myself smaller because certain people don’t want to grow. They will
have to adjust! Most of these people aren’t even Spirit-filled so why do I care
what they think anyway? We are on totally different pages.
It’s not
going to be easy for me, but I’m willing to allow God to work in me. This year
is going to be spent walking courageously in who I am in Christ. I have to be
brave. What do I have to lose? I remember this dream I had several years ago. I
was in a swing/seat that was attached to a mountain (like a ski lift, but I was
at the bottom). I remember jumping a little and as soon as I jumped the
chair/swing/seat clicked and started to move forward, pulling me up the
mountain (like a ski lift). It was just a little jump from me that set it all
in motion. Jason Upton has a song called “Scarecrow”, it also is another
powerful encouragement.
The lyrics
are full of truth, “There’s a scarecrow standing in a farmers field. What it’s
guarding has not been revealed. I can’t find something that’s been found
before. And I won’t find nothing if I close that door. If I were a bird, if I were a foolish bird,
I’d listen to my fear and fly away from here. But if I were a bird, if I were a
wise bird, I’d listen to my heart and find a treasure waiting in the field.
The scarecrow
is a trick to fool us into backing away from the very thing God is calling us
to. Right next to the scarecrow is a fruitful garden. It’s about perspective. Maybe,
just maybe, the enemy has set up scarecrows in our lives to keep us from
discovering the very things that are ours in Christ!
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